In an Air Mail exclusive, the embattled actor denies criminal wrongdoing but says, “I’m here to own my mistakes, take accountability for the fact that I was an asshole, that I was selfish, that I used people to make me feel better, and when I was done, moved on.”
He also revealed, for the first time, his suicidal intent in the Cayman Islands in February 2021 by swimming as far out in the ocean as he could and hoping he would die as a result of a tragedy like drowning, a shark attack or boat accident.
Of the alleged childhood trauma, Hammer said, “What that did for me was it introduced sexuality into my life in a way that it was completely out of my control.
I was powerless in the situation. I had no agency in the situation. Sexuality was introduced to me in a scary way where I had no control. My interests then went to: I want to have control in the situation, sexually.”
The article states that Hammer confided in an older friend, who has since died, and a godmother, Candace Garvey, who confirmed the account to Air Mail.
Regarding the incident that Kirchick describes in the piece as “attempted suicide,” Hammer offered, “I just walked out into the ocean and swam out as far as I could and hoped that either I drowned, or was hit by a boat, or eaten by a shark. Then I realized that my kids were still on shore, and that I couldn’t do that to my kids.”
The public first became aware of Hammer’s troubles in January 2021 when several women came forward with allegations of misconduct and messages containing BDSM fantasies and cannibalistic fetishism.
The most damning allegations came from a woman tied to a social media account called House of Effie. She alleged that Hammer had sexually assaulted her and that they had been in a years-long relationship. Effie, who has since been identified by her real name Efrosina Angelova, retained attorney Gloria Allred, but no charges were ever filed in the case. She and Allred eventually parted ways. Per Air Mail’s story, Angelova did not respond to Kirchick’s multiple requests for comment, and blocked the writer on Instagram after he reached out with detailed questions.
Kirchick’s reporting in the Air Mail piece disputes Angelova’s claims. The writer details direct messages he obtained that Angelova sent to Hammer’s then-wife Chambers disclosing the affair and allegedly writing, “I was pretty much chasing him.” Per Hammer, the sexual encounter she referred to as rape was a “scene” they orchestrated in advance.
“She planned all of the details out, all the way down to what Starbucks I would see her at, how I would follow her home, how her front door would be open and unlocked and I would come in, and we would engage in what is called a ‘consensual non-consent scene,’ CNC,” Hammer said of the known kink activity. “Every single thing was discussed beforehand. I have never thrust this on someone unexpectedly. Never.”
Hammer also offered a response to accusations from two women he had relations with, Courtney Vucekovich and Paige Lorenze, both of whom declined comment for the story or did not respond to requests. Vucekovich appeared prominently in the Discovery+ docuseries House of Hammer as she detailed their months-long relationship and BDSM activity. “I would have these younger women in their mid-20s, and I’m in my 30s,” he said. “I was a successful actor at the time. They could have been happy to just be with me and would have said yes to things that maybe they wouldn’t have said yes to on their own. That’s an imbalance of power in the situation.”
“I’m here to own my mistakes, take accountability for the fact that I was an asshole, that I was selfish, that I used people to make me feel better, and when I was done, moved on,” Hammer continued. “I’m now a healthier, happier, more balanced person. I’m able to be there for my kids in a way I never was. I’m truly grateful for my life and my recovery and everything. I would not go back and undo everything that’s happened to me.”
As for what’s currently happening with him, Hammer tells the writer-at-large that he’s found purpose in helping a fellow recovering addict on his sobriety journey, as substance abuse has played a large part in Hammer’s life and troubles. “I’m going to move in with him and live with him, get him on a healthy routine, get him into a good schedule of [recovery] meetings, take him to the gym, cook healthy food for him,” he said of serving as a sober companion. “It feels like my recovery has taken a turn from me being the one who needs help staying sober, to me being able to help others.”
According to a Vanity Fair report, Hammer has been helped on his recovery journey by Downey Jr. who faced a downfall as a result of drugs and alcohol but has emerged as a sobriety advocate and support system to many in need.
Hammer referenced Downey when speaking about cancel culture. “There are examples everywhere, Robert Downey Jr. being one of them, of people who went through those things and found redemption through a new path. And that, I feel like, is what’s missing in this cancel-culture, woke-mob business. The minute anyone does anything wrong, they’re thrown away. There’s no chance for rehabilitation.”
The full story can be read on Air Mail.
