Dying for Sex: Hulu’s Bold Series, Starring Oscar Nominee Michelle Williams

The multiple Oscar nominated actress who stars in the bold series, based on true story, discusses her character’s sexual discovery and forgiveness: “I wanted to disconnect pleasure and shame.”

Dying for Sex -- "You're Killing Me, Ernie" -- Episode 7 (Airs Friday, April 4 on Hulu ) -- Pictured: (l-r) Michelle Williams as Molly. CR: Sarah Shatz/FX — Williams in ‘Dying for Sex.’ Sarah Shatz/FX

“I’ve never even had orgasm, and now I’m going to die,” Michelle Williams’ Molly Kochan says in the first episode of Dying for Sex.

Her diagnosis sparks her to leave her husband Steve (Jay Duplass), and explore her sexual desires and kinks with herself and random men she meets on dating apps.

Showrunners Kim Rosenstock and Elizabeth Meriwether adapted the series from the real-life Molly, who spoke about her experiences on podcast with friend Nikki Boyer (Jenny Slate in the series).

While Dying for Sex is filled with scenes of Williams venturing into BDSM and trying her partner’s fetishes, all in hopes of achieving her goal (an orgasm), her plight highlights her confronting the trauma she endured at early age, which is where her issues with sexual intimacy came from.

When Molly was child, her mother Gail’s (Sissy Spacek) boyfriend spiked her mom’s drink, and while she passed out, he molested Molly.

Molly has resentment for her mom, but as she’s in hospice and knows her days are up, she seemingly finds forgiveness. Molly tells her she’s ready to accept her fate; she looks at her and is about to say something else before Gail interjects, “Anything you could say to me, I already know.”

Williams explains how she prepped to play a character who will die, the emotions behind her wild sex scenes.

This role is different from anything you’ve played

She and Nikki laid out the map for us. When I signed on, only one script was written. I knew how the story ended, but I didn’t know the details of everything that was going to happen in between. I had great faith in Liz [Meriwether] and her ability to combine drama and humor. I wanted to take that leap with her, with Jenny, with the two tremendous men, Rob Delaney and Jay Duplass. This was a tribe I wanted to be a member of.

Then we had the podcast, and we knew there was material they had already given us. So even though the scripts weren’t written, I could start to work off of what they had laid down. And Molly wrote a book; one of her ambitions was to finish this book before she passed, and she did. The book goes into her childhood and family relationships in detail. So, as we were waiting for more scripts, I could start to process.

Williams and Jay Duplass in *Dying for Sex.* Sarah Shatz/FX

Many sex scenes in show

The scripts kept rolling in as we were filming. We would be in the middle of an episode and then we would get a script for the next one. At this point, I had watched the first two and then maybe three scripts roll in, and I had felt so enlivened after reading them.

While maybe in my schooled brain, it’s like the way you were habituated to think or maybe what you were taught or told as child or adolescent. The things you’ve tried to free yourself from as a grown woman and also as parent of daughter, in my attempt to untangle myself from these ideas that were given to me. I wanted to break from that tradition and pass something different onto my own daughter.

I heard a tiny little alarm bell twinkling in the back of my brain, saying, “Oh, that might be embarrassing, or somebody might be upset with you, or what will so-and-so think?” But then my next thought was, “Fantastic! This is exactly what I set out to do. I want to disconnect pleasure and shame.”

That’s really one of the journeys the character goes on, so can she experience something that’s meant for her that is pleasurable without feeling bad for it, or something that’s going to befall her because of it. I really leapt wholeheartedly into these scenarios, whether they be masturbatory or partnered with men that she meets along the way.

What was Molly going to say to mom before she died

Oh my gosh, probably “I love you.” But I can’t really remember because I haven’t seen the scene. I’m not entirely sure, but that’s the first thing that comes to my mind. Or “I forgive you,” probably is more like it.

Williams and Sissy Spacek in *Dying for Sex.* Sarah Shatz/FX

Was it emotional to film your last scene?

It was messed up! It really, man, it gets you. Because you spend so much time with these characters and you’ve gone through many experiences as them that by the time you walk into the set and you realize it’s the hospice set, it tricks your brain a little bit. When you have to get in the wheelchair and they wheel you, it hurts. It hurts to be lying down and saying goodbye to these actors that you love and have loved working with, and then to the characters that you’ve been on these journeys with; it stings.

It’s suffused with light and joy because she’s doing it on her own terms, which is really what happened. And then, of course, there’s this wonderful absurdity of the dream sequence–all the things that come back to visit her. But there is undeniable sting to it, and you have to let yourself walk fully into the room. At first, you’re a little bit afraid to cross that threshold into that hospice set because you know how it ends. But then all you can do is gather arms with everybody you’ve been working with for the past months and go wholeheartedly into it.

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Dying for Sex is now streaming on Hulu.

Dying for Sex: Hulu’s Bold Series, Starring Oscar Nominee Michelle Williams

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